We are nearing the end of our adoption process with Josie, who currently lives in China. She has an urgent medical condition and we have been in the process of adoption for 9 months now. For Josie, very little has changed during these months, she has lived a predictable life in her orphanage unaware what is happening on our side. We had an incredible long (but thorough) home study process, we were approved by the Chinese government as well as the US government to adopt her. We received a document that matches us with her officially and we gladly said YES! This phase of adoption is centered around the adoptive parent as we follow the rules and regulations on our side of the ocean. We eagerly anticipate the arrival of a child we never met, while she is unaware of our existence.
It won’t be long and the paperwork will be all done and the real work of adoption begins. Josie will learn she has a family, as we sent a photo album to her introducing us as her family. She will learn that like so many other children in her orphanage, she will leave everything that is familiar to her and start a new journey that comes with losses and gains. Adoption isn’t all or nothing, it will be a mixture or grief and joy and we will allow room for both. Right now my heart and hers reside on two different continents, an ocean apart, but soon we will begin a journey of attachment. The experience will be different for each of us and I know the dance it requires.
Adopted children are often referred to as lucky or fortunate to have a second chance at a family. Having adopted before, I realize the loss that comes before and none of that seems lucky to me. I won’t pretend to know how Josie will feel about being adopted or if she will ultimately feel that it was all worth it. Many people, including an adoption agency evaluated her current situation and feel that a family is a better choice for her. And we will welcome her into our family while honoring her first family and all they did for her.
The next few weeks before travel will be an emotional time for us. There are many preparations that will keep us busy, but there is also a keen sense of all that Josie will go through. I hope you understand that much of the experiences she will go through will be private and not on this blog, but I hope you share in our joy as we welcome her home very soon!
Now on to the Adoption Talk Linkup!
New to linking up? We’d love to have you join us, here’s how.