Eve doesn’t walk….yet
Eve isn’t communicating with signs….yet
Eve is not drinking from a cup….yet
I find myself using these phrases at doctor’s appointments, school meetings, discussions with friends or relatives. I can’t seem to say the first part, without adding the word yet. I wonder if my yet is viewed as a mom who is unhappy with the way things are or if they will truly understand my feelings behind using the word yet.
Right now, the word “yet” gives us power to hope for Eve’s future. It gives us permission to say that we know more miracles are around the corner. That the hours she works so hard in therapy each week are for a purpose. And we hope that she will get to experience new things as a result of that hard work.
Yet, if nothing changes, if nothing improves, if life tomorrow is exactly as the days before, she is loved just the same. Her performance is not a measure of her worth.
So I guess this is really the heart of parenting a child with special needs. We live in the moment, we hope for the future and we constantly worry that our moments with our kids are cut short. Balancing all these feelings is the essence of my journey as a special needs mom.